“Forgiveness is the New F*** word”

This is a slogan on one of my T-shirts.

It’s so easy to be offended isn’t it. Working for a Christian organisation it’s sometimes easier to be offended by fellow Christians than it is by those we are seeking to reach.

We make allowances for those who might not know better but those that do know better had better watch out right? I have passed judgement on people based on a previous offence or hurt they caused me. It’s almost like I’m getting them back on a spiritual level. But it’s not my or your fight. Romans 12: 19 tells us “Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord”

At this point I can hear the famous Frozen song, “Let it go” being sung in my head. But I don’t want to let it go, I want them to feel the hurt I feel. Will forgiving them make the wrong right again? No the wrong will still be wrong but by forgiving we make a choice out of our will to release forgiveness to them.

In Luke 6: 37 Jesus commands us, “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven”

So we are commanded to forgive and whilst I know this is the right thing to do why can’t I do it Lord? I need your help Jesus to forgive. This is the one of the best prayers you could ever pray. Forgiveness is a process and without the help of Jesus we will be chained to the offence and offender forever. We fall out of God’s covering and are open to attack from the unholy trinity: sin, the world and the devil.

I have seen people I minister with become a different person when I mention someone they have “fallen out with”. The anger, bitterness and pain is unbearable to watch. I remember one lady doing this during a time of prayer at the end of our weekly worship and Bible study. She went from 0 to 99 in a second. Wow was she cross with this person. This new Christian needed to know that Jesus did not think the offence was ok and alright. The offence was wrong but holding back forgiveness was causing this lady medical ailments. The person who had caused the offence was oblivious to this offence they had caused and was getting on with life. Prompted by Jesus, I suggested she ask Jesus to help her to forgive. She was sceptical but prepared to try. That’s all it takes is a willingness to open up to Jesus and get His help. It was a process but what a difference that forgiveness brought. The joy and love that radiates from her face now is breath taking.

It takes one to forgive and two to reconcile. You may never have a meaningful relationship with the offender again but you will be free from your chains of offence. In my next blog we will explore what you do when you have an on-going relationship with the person that is causing the offence.